So enjoy..!

Answers:

Q) Hani Obaid: Describe in detail your ideal future wife?

A: Good question, because I really don’t know. I don’t know because I am not looking, and if I start looking I will maybe start setting the “ideal” traits of “the one”. But I have an idea in my mind and it’s simple. She should be an individualist who has her own life, plans, brains, culture, friends, ambitions, and dreams. I know that people in this age don’t have a clear idea what they want to do (and I am not an exception by the way), but I demand some level of determination and character. Nobody is perfect, but she should be complete because I am not planning to complete anybody. If she is not a complete individual, then not I, not anybody in the world will ever complete her. I will be a life time companion, not a baby sitter. This sounds a little bit complicated, but it’s not. Most of my female friends fall into this category, so it’s not as complicated as it seems.
Of course, I am an Islamist, so this should be taken into consideration. Age is not a big issue to me, but of course she shouldn’t be 10 years older than me. Acceptable looks is also important.
Another important thing is manners. I demand respect and appreciation. Respect is the only way to communicate with me, yelling is a deal breaker. Cheating is a deal breaker.

I hope this is detailed enough Hani :). All this might change, because I told you I don’t have a clear idea on the “ideal wife”, and I don’t have a clear decision on whether I am going to get married any time soon or whether I am ever going to get married (for so many reasons).

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Q) d : Name three people you admire. People in your life, not historical characters.

A: First, “d”, thanks for always reading my blog, even though I don’t know who you are, but you make me feel appreciated .
Admiration is a big word, and I could give you a big big list hadn’t you demanded that you want people “in my life”. I have great friends and cousins who I like, but admiration is something else. I can name only one character that I truly admire and he is an uncle of mine. He is by far the greatest man in my life. Nothing super about him, except that he is an honest man. An honest man, a real man. This is the kind of man that if asked whether he is a good man or not his answer will be unquestionably yes. This man lives for himself, his family, his cousins , and for everybody. Meet him once and you will remember him forever because he still keeps his childhood innocence, and he keeps it easily, no matter how hard the circumstances he lives in. He is in his 50s now by the way.

That’s someone I admire. Other than him, it’s really hard for me to truly “admire” people.

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Q) Mayasi : She asked four questions. There you go:

1- Where do u live n irbed?

I don’t live in Irbid anymore. I studied in Irbid, so I lived there for five years. Now I live and work in Kuwait

2- have u ever fallen in love?

Yes.

3- What do u wear in ur house? I mean are u tidy or just like that?

Pyjamas. “Just like that”

4- how many girls u talk to now?
I’m not in a relationship, the only girls I talk to are my female friends and co-workers.

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Q) LostWithin: what word best describes you?

A: Hopeful.
Despite my rather increasing cynicism, I still see myself as a very hopeful person. I have extremely high hopes on so many levels, and trust me my friend, the day I lose hope is the day I declare myself officially dead.

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Q) Basil: What is the thing that you did and will regret for the rest of your life??
A: So many things. I seek Allah forgiveness for all the sins I’ve committed. We are humans, and we all do mistakes, and I have faithful hope that Allah may forgive me.

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Q) Mab3oos: let’s say you are the president of some country, and you wanted to get a taxi cap, what color of socks would you wear knowing that the game on TV is canceled, and why would you not pick your nose at the traffic light as a guy waves at you and asks you for directions?

A) I will wear pink socks that matches the queer flip flops I’ll be wearing. And why of course I’ll pick my nose and shake hands with the first person I meet.

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Q) Sara: How often do you think of death & what do you think of it?

A: Very often. On a daily basis. I think it’s both intimidating and painful.

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Q) sweetlikearose: My friend Bara’ asked three question.

1. kam sar waznak?(What’s your current weight?)

A: Now it’s 90 KGs.

These are pictures of me last month, I put on a lot of weight recently, for so many reasons.

This is me last summer, see the difference hehe.

2. lesh ma bet7eb elsekerterat??(Why do you hate female secretaries?)

A: Well, liar if I say I don’t have issues with female secretaries! It’s because of many incidents. The ones I loathe are those that are hired based on their looks and only looks. And mind me, it’s not even looks, It’s how much their clothes are revealing. Not that it’s my business or anything, because really to each his own. But when I go to a big corporate,a classified governmental agency, or a big enterprise, the least I except from an employee is to know the difference between the TV and the computer. Trust me guys, if I ask a piece a furniture or if I ask that “chick” secretary, the response will be the same: a dumb smile “maba3ref” (I don’t know). So what I do now is, I just get inside without acknowledging their existence and find whatever I want by myself, because she’s paid to set there and give smiles only. lol. They wasted hell lot of my time!

3) sho aktar mawqef mo7rej sar m3ak bema63am?? (What’s the most embarrassing thing happened to you in a restaurant?)

A: Nothing special that I recall. But when my friends and I gather, it’s always embarrassing, we will be the noisy table with guys laughing out loud continuously. Last weekend I couldn’t stop imitating the Filipino waitress accent (or is it aqsen6? lol). So things like that always happen. We never run out of jokes.

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Q) Sharifo:

1) Eish el asbab ele khalatak Nerd bel taree2a hadi ? (Why do you become nerd?)

A: Because I don’t have anything else to do. Nothing interests me enough so I tend to challenge myself with school work. I picked that habit when I was in the 6th grade.

2) when you are out anywhere not in a work mission, do you carry a pen or a pencil ?

A: Nope. I hardly carry myself, and I take one of my colleagues just to have an audience for the jokes I keep making up.

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Q) TripleM: Have you ever been French kissed by a male friend before?

A: Why of course, I give French kisses to my guy friends all the time, because that’s what guy friends do !

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Q) LuLu…!:
1. do u really love god more than anyone??

A: I’m trying my friend. It’s the mission of every Muslim, it’s not something to be done on the fly, neither is it something you stumble upon. It’s a life time job, it’s the journey each Muslim should enjoy during his span of years on earth.

2. have u ever felt b4 that u really hate urself and y???

A: Never, ever.

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Q) Asoom: if you can change one circumstance in your life right now what would it be?

A: I’d choose a better family maybe, and easier circumstances. Things are/were pretty hard on me, and I’ve been holding responsibilities nobody my age should be holding. Alhamdulillah for everything. Many people have harder situations, and what doesn’t kill you is supposed to make you stronger (or at least I hope so).

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Q) Moh’d Shaltaf:

حزب الله سيستعيد رفات كل شهدائه و رفات شهداء فلسطينيين وعلى رأسهم رفات الشهيدة دلال المغربي في صفقة لتبادل الأسرى عن طريق وسيط ألماني؟

A:
شعوري قريب من شعور الشهيد الكاتب غسان كنفاني:
“إنني أشعر أكثر من أي وقت مضى أن كل قيمة كلماتي كانت في أنها تعويض صفيق وتافه ل …”
الباقي عندك.

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Q) Noura:

1. Have u ever fallen in Love ?? real love, not a crush ..

A. Yes, badly, madly, and deeply. And yes, I am a hopeless romantic, how about that?

2. If you were to plan something romantic for your future wife, what would it be ??

A. Nothing on my mind right now, and nothing is planned. It depends on her, our relationship, situation, and many other factors. I am fairly creative, only when “I” want to. As a kid I was a noticeable mouth-smart, and I still possess the ability to express myself fluently, this is the special gift God gave to me. I can also make eloquent speeches if I want to, so chances are it’ll be something written or spoken.

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So guys, I hope the answers were satisfying

I will answer the first four questions you guys ask in the comments. Only the first four.

So go on, ask me whatever you want, and I will just answer. Show some creativity

Something I’ve been trying to write but never managed to finish… It’s the silent emptiness of despair that’s filling my universe. I live in denial, I act normally most of the time, eventhough I deeply know that nothing is even close to normal, and normal is a very relative term. It could be normal, but it’s not. Something isn’t right and I know it. I’ve tried to run away, to evade, to disappear, to vanish, but I couldn’t. I just couldn’t. I am more convinced than ever that I can change many, many things, but I can’t change myself. I can’t pretend, I can’t evade, and I can’t change what I am.

This could be depression, a very severe and advanced state of sadness, so deep that it blackened my surroundings and narrowed my universe to the point of chocking me to death. Not exactly death, but to a rather long term torture where I can’t even beg for death because I’m scared it could be worse. It could really be worse.

I can’t put an end to all this, because I am strained, but neither can I silently watch. I tried to escape and “live my life” only to come back more messed up than before. I see them every single night in my dreams, they’re alive, and their eyes are distant, expressionless. They lost interest in life, death, and the promised heaven after death. I can’t hide, not in a nightmare where I am the center of attention. I can’t hide from their inevitable reproachful starring eyes, but only it’s much more intimidating than that. It’s a hopeless look without the faintest trace of interest. Truth I’ve been trying to escape my entire life. It creeps, and it fills me with unbearable sadness and pain. It’s living in my subconscious, nurtured by my desperate impotence, by my fear. Fear is the right word. It’s the painful word I’ve been looking for all this time.

There’s no end to this, I am sentenced to this. I can’t change that. It’s either the suffocating endless hours of conscience pain, or the hollow emptiness agony of denial. Either fear of the aftermath of denial, or fear of the painful reality of any reckless desperate reaction. Either way, it’s a constant self-loathing state of disgust.

سريع الانفعال…وفقدت كل قدراتي الدبلوماسية في كل مجالات حياتي

يعني بطلت أسكت على أصغر الأمور..وحاسس إني مش مطالب إني أسكت ولا أتحمل حماقات أحد, ومش مجبور أحمل أو أبرر أخطاء أحد..اللي فيني مكفيني

صرت أتبع مبدأ يا أبيض يا أسود…الكلام معي صار صعب والنقاش صار شبه مستحيل

يعني يا ملاك يا شيطان..مافي وسط…وبطلت أتحمل نفاق ..وبطلت أعطي شهادة براءة لا لنفسي ولا لأحد

هذا تغير مش مفاجىء ولكن كان متوقع…لأن كثرة السكوت تولد الانفجار…

على العموم من المدونات القليلة اللي لفت نظري مدونة محمد عمر

رجل رائع, وانسان مثقف صاحب ضمير

وهذا شيء صار نادر هذي الأيام للأسف

http://www.mohomar.com/mohomar

ذكرتني بأيام المقاومة اليسارية…وأعمالها وشعارتها..وقصص قديمة وجديدة

عالعموم هذه الاغنية قديمة…لشهداء جبهة المقاومة الوطنية اللبنانية وخصيصا للشهيد سلام جابر
وعنوان الاغنية بكي دم ذلك ان الشظايا ادمت وجه الشهيد سلام وكانت الدماء على وجنتيه كالدموع فكانت هذه الاغنية. ومؤلف وملحن هذه الاغنية هو الموسيقي الفلسطيني ويليام نصار
وغناء ويليام نصار ودنيا كريم

This Mosaic is abstracting the chaos inside me..I loved the result

to do it yourself, Click here.

Here’s my chaotic Mosaic..

Abed: Fine..same shit different day.

Y: No it doesn’t go like this

Y: It’s “Same shit, different toilet”